A little reflection

I've had many pockets of alone time to reflect on the now and then of things, but just never really properly sat down with the inspiration to let the words flow on this blog. They say the best writers are the most depressed ones. Because your words are impactful and emotional and you write great stories when you are at your lowest moments. I suppose I didn't have that much low moments except busy ones at that.

The culmination of events rolling about from the Finals of year 1 sem 1, to the happening of Boulderactive that has been organised since too long ago, to the closing of Boulderactive, to preparing for Ceuse. And life has seemed to finally slowed down now that I've finally posted out the shirts for Boulderactive.

Seeing how my bank account is almost dried up, never at any point in my life had I went past this new low, I am quite desperate to fill it back again and I thought I could give myself some time off to catch up with myself. Because I've been so caught up with others that I've neglected myself for way too long. Too long as with the lack of updates here.

I think there's something wrong with me. I just can't sit still and not do something productive. Something that's called work. I can't. I need to be up and about, paid or unpaid work, I just have to make some good use of the time I have on my hands. I need some rest, but my body keeps going and going.

The soul is lagging so far behind, struggling to catch up with how I have zoomed past everything in my life. It feels so weary and tired. So in need of a break. Adulthood beckons, and with it, all its responsibilities, that I've already had taken on since too young.

There wasn't enough time to just laze around, stare into space and just chill in Ceuse, as I thought a good break would have been. Packed from day to day, with little things to do every day, and all the little things added up to being something. I felt as equally busy as I've ever been in Singapore.


Some nights, I just like to feel the cool breeze in my face, and not think about anything for a moment.

Moments when you just wish life would come to a standstill, and you embrace that moment as if it was forever.