Status

Our interesting St Patrick's Day conversation on Saturday at Starbucks with the 3 of them, P, R, C (hahaha) led me to this post on the importance of having a status in a relationship.

Chanel almost died in anger (lol) trying to defend her stand on having one while Pam and I supported the prolonging of the official-ness. Quoting P's current situation is like my ideal state I'd want to pursue too - of finding out more about the person, learning about his quirks, dating for as long as possible, before becoming officially attached. But then again, like Chanel mentioned, what would actually define officially attached if everything that you do during the process of getting to know each other better is actually equivalent to being officially together? The focus of her point was the hurt that would occur regardless whether there was status to the relationship or not.

I realised that we tend to take things very quickly when we happen to find someone we think might be the one. The heartbreak that occurs is really no less than being in an officious relationship anyway. This is the top reason why I support the whole process of really knowing someone, and falling for your best friend, than going heart-first, adrenaline-rushed relationship which probably wouldn't sustain when the trough will occur some day. And I still believe in people standing by you during adversities. Many truths of a person appear during that difficult period. And since life isn't all that smooth all the time, the longer the duration you get to engage with a particular person, the more you see the realness of one.

One good example, I took a good 6 years to uncover a truth I never knew from a friend I thought I knew so well. Such is the reality. And I have become more judging than perceiving over the years, which means it's pretty bad because it was a huge disappointment to know something about the person I didn't think he would ever have been.

But I still believe in the goodness of many people. And I think I'm really lucky to be in the company of my few close valued friends who can always pick up where we last stopped.

Interesting article I came across somewhat regarding this. I actually agree with it. Ha!